Control – A Lighthouse for the Soul

Mother Mary on Using Surrender-Trust to Overcome the Need to Control

July 5, 2026 by Rob Loveland, posted in Channeling, spiritual guidance, spiritual info

[This is the fifth in a series of six messages related to the Infinity Keys, the pairing of the Keys to Self with the Keys to Heaven, which will be the subject of a series of workshops to begin 29 Aug 2026. Stay tuned for upcoming announcements. — Rob]

Rob: So today, we are continuing in our series of going through each of the Infinity Keys, this time specifically the pairings of the keys of Surrender and Trust in order to overcome the need to control events in our lives, the thoughts and beliefs of others, and any other aspect. So I am coming to meet Mother Mary.

So Mother, over to you. Do you have anything to share with us today?

Mother Mary: Welcome, Rob. It is a pleasure to meet with you again. Yes, it is your mother, Mary, and I’ve come to talk to you, as you’ve requested, about Surrender and Trust.

As you well know, you are the author of all events in your life, all experiences you choose to have, so this human need to control events or attempt to control events is somewhat of a paradox. In reality, since you decide what all your experiences will be, you are, in fact, controlling all events. Control is always in your hands. You decide what you’re going to experience. Yes, there are those of us on this side who have agreed to be your guides and are helping you in your decisions, but ultimately, it is your choice.

And so, as you progress on your journey of ascension, your spiritual journey, you find yourself wanting to control the external events, and you become frustrated when the events don’t turn out the way that you had assumed. This is your human mind, your lower dimensional mind, thinking that you are isolated, that you are separated from all others.

In reality, as you have seen through the other keys, there can be no such thing as separation from Source and All-That-Is, therefore all events in your life, all events that you experience, were placed there by agreement with you. This is what you choose to experience to show you something, something about your own beliefs, your own attitudes, your own limitations. In reality, the only limitations that exist for you in this life are those that YOU have placed upon yourself.

So in the human form, once you understand that you are trying to control events, the Keys to Heaven and the Keys to Self are the means by which you can overcome that sense of control, that sense of a need to control. Surrender your desire to dictate the outcomes, the outcomes on the surface, what is apparent to see. But again, in reality, all outcomes are exactly as you choose them to be, have chosen them to be.

So surrender your need. Surrender yourself to the Divine Plan, to My plan, with your assistance, and therefore, your plan. Surrender yourself to THAT.

Trust. This requires trust, that you believe that there is a plan, that it all will be better, that you are working towards something greater, greater than yourself, greater than what you can see. It’s all for a purpose, and it is all perfect in its construction to achieve that purpose.

And so surrender goes along with trust. Once you surrender yourself to the Divine Plan, you are trusting that there is a Divine Plan, and that you are part of that, and that all will work out as exactly as it is intended.

And once you get to that point, then that need to control just naturally falls away. Again, that is a human construct, a lower dimensional construct, only necessary in this realm of linear time and sequencing of events, for all of it is actually, in reality, orchestrated to give you the experience that you choose to have, more often than not, to teach you to surrender yourself to something that is much larger than what you can see for yourself within this experience.

Quan Yin on Handling Disappointments

March 23, 2026March 22, 2026 by Rob Loveland, posted in Channeling, Quan Yin, spiritual guidance, spiritual info

Rob: So I have Quan Yin, but she’s not on the dragon. She’s on the lotus blossom. Interesting. Okay.

Quan Yin, thank you for coming to speak with me, to speak to us. In a previous session today, I heard a question about how could/should we handle disappointments as they arise? So I’d love to hear your thoughts on that.

Quan Yin: Hello, Rob. Hello, all. As always, it is such a pleasure to be able to speak with you in this way. And thank you for receiving me.

You were correct in your analysis of disappointment. It’s really coming from a place, or that it only arises, when events of the world or events in your life do not happen the way that you expected — or as your teammate rightly pointed out, events as you WANTED them to occur — that all of this is really your attempt to control events. We often do this, even unconsciously. We have expectations. We have beliefs about what the will of Heaven is, about how events should unfold, and we develop expectations about those events and how they should unfold. But this is not always the most prudent way forward.

It’s very difficult for humans to fully understand the will of Heaven, the plan, the Divine Plan, and how all events should unfold for the greatest good of all. So it’s easy to fall into the trap of wanting something to happen, to unfold in a particular way, but this is really you exerting your own sense of control over the situations. And then, as you know, anytime you try to exert your control, it usually doesn’t work out the way you think or the way you expect.

So you were correct in discerning that the antidote to control is trust, trust in the Divine Plan. And you get there, you learn that trust, by surrendering yourself to the Divine Plan, even when you do not understand the fullness of what that plan entails. You are simply trusting that all will work out for the greatest good of all, even if you cannot see what that is for all.

It will be easy in the coming days to fall into this trap. Events are unfolding in your lives, on planet, out in a greater society and world events, that many will find disturbing, so there will be a natural tendency to have expectations about what all that means, how it should unfold, what the ramifications of any event should be. But again, there is a subtleness to this, that that is simply attempting to exert your own control, based on your own beliefs, which at this stage is not necessarily from a place of the highest perspective with the greatest good of all concerned.

And then, of course, there is also the possibility of being disappointed with yourself, that as you come to learn and witness events unfolding in a way that was different than what you expected, to get down on yourselves, to be disappointed with yourselves for not understanding the fullness of the plan. Patience! Be patient with yourself. Be compassionate for yourself. You are not meant to understand the full plan.

Archangel Uriel on Releasing the Need to Control and Unconditional Love

January 11, 2026 by Rob Loveland, posted in archangels, Channeling, spiritual guidance, spiritual info

[I recently read a channeling of the Arcturian Group by Marilyn Raffaele in which they talked about a recurring habit of attempting to exert control — it really smacked me in the face, so my teammates and I talked about it, at which point I decided to ask Archangel Uriel about it. — Rob]

Rob: Uriel, maybe you could give us some thoughts, in order to proceed on our ascension journey, on what is the role of releasing all sense of control, whether we need to release it and how we do that? The Arcturian Group message clearly resonated with me, so there’s something there for me, I know. So do you have anything to share in that regard?

AA Uriel: Greetings, Rob. Greetings, all. This is Uriel, as you’ve requested. And you honor me with your request, and I thank you for that.

You’ve been mulling over this question in your mind for a couple of days now, and I commend you for the honesty that you are showing within yourself to look at yourself critically, your own behaviors, your own thoughts, your own beliefs. But what does it mean to control?

It is true that the ultimate entry way, doorway to the next levels within ascension, within the ascension process, all comes down to how well you can express unconditional love, first and foremost, to yourself, for yourself. And that, of course, is reflected by your feelings about all others [and] all that you see, for all that you see is merely a reflection of what is inside of you.

It is a construct that you have put there to show you what is going on with inside of you, experiences that you choose to have in order to eliminate one part of your belief system or another, so that you may examine that and decide what is it that I want from this point. Do I believe in my belief system? Is that correct? Is that the way I want to be in the future?

All experiences enable you to see what lives within you, and you know what lives within you based on your emotional reaction to whatever it is that you’re witnessing.

The idea that was introduced to you about releasing all sense of control is exactly correct, for any time you are attempting to exert control over others means you are trying to control some aspect of your own belief system, based on what you currently believe. This, of course, builds barriers to your advancement.

So showing a lack of the need to control and surrendering completely to what is is, in fact, an act of unconditional love. Think about that word for a moment, “unconditional” love. Are you placing conditions on how you feel about another, how you feel about yourself?

God does not place such conditions on his love for you, you being part of that Godhead. So, in like fashion, you are being asked to examine your own sense of love for all others. Are you expressing that unconditionally, that no matter what another does, says, believes, that you love them nonetheless for who they are, that is part and parcel of God, of the Divine, of you.

So, yes, releasing all sense of control is the gateway to moving forward. And anytime you find yourself wishing to exert some sense of control, which most often appears as you setting an expectation about how others or how yourself should act in any given situation, that is your indicator. Are you able to love yourself, to love all others, to love all that you see without those expectations and to just allow them to be as they are, wherever they are on their journey, wherever you are on your journey? Can you love yourself enough to just let it be?